We all face struggles in our daily lives and in the the pursuit of our goals/dreams/careers. Both as a human being and in our given professional lives as well. For me, this culminates in what I am; a full time drummer. Several years ago, after moonlighting as a part time professional drummer for many years, I took the plunge and took on my dreams full time. It’s been said that most people don’t live out their dreams because they are unwilling to sacrifice enough to achieve them. There have been many things I have had to sacrifice to make it work as well. I gave up living on my own to reduce my financial overhead, among many other reasons. It is a logical step, as the key to building any business is to minimize your overhead to maximize your income after the bills are paid, especially since income will be very small at first. As a very private person that highly values their personal space and freedom to live on one’s own terms, this constantly takes a toll on me, but is something I chose to surrender for the end goal. Others often look down on you as well, like you are being lazy or not responsible enough to live on your own. I will not let pride keep me from living out my dreams, and I choose to take that hit up front and let people think what they will, for the prize I am after later, but don’t think it doesn’t sting.
I also surrendered something most people are completely unwilling to give up. Romantic relationships. No, I am not some new age monk or something like that. Just not getting tangled up in serious relationships where I will be gone all of the time and leaving people feeling neglected or unimportant. There are some silver linings here however that make this much more bearable for me. For one, I was wired to be a lone wolf kind of guy. I am fiercely independent, and as stated above, I value my space and freedom. I am a bit of a free spirit and a rebel, though not without reason or logic. I do not like being overtly controlled or manipulated away from my goals. I view this as a willful attack on me and my future, which makes manipulators an enemy, attempting to sabotage what I am working so hard and giving up so much for. I have seen relationships get in the way of dreams so often that this is most certainly a necessary step. I will revisit serious relationships after I have secured my future…maybe.
The sacrifices alone are not the issue. The struggles are just as daunting. As a drummer in this day and age, it is very difficult to just play drums in one band and make good money. Even before Covid-19 decimated the entertainment world, just playing an instrument in one band would not get you enough to build a future with, at least for those not in a multi-platinum selling national band selling our arenas every week. Here in the real world, you have to work to earn (even lazy jobless musicians). Most bands, even busy ones, don’t play enough to keep their musicians afloat without a job or side job. Even the regional and limited national touring acts. Doubly so if you are a “hired gun.” So I have done what I can to offer as much as I can. Not only do I play drums, but I am a decent backup singer (thanks to Seal, Sting, the radio, and lots of time practicing in the shower and car), a decent soundman (live, learning all the time on the recording end), a writer/contributor, and an amateur Video and Photo guy (videographers and photographers are pros, and that is not me). The more one can offer, the more valuable one becomes, and to that end, I am always working to become more valuable.
So the next logical step is to add more bands, and I have. I am the drummer (ie; permanent drummer, as in, member of the band) for Diamonds & Whiskey (country/rock), Thirsty Horses (cover/rock/pop), and Rosewave (rock/alternative/metal). I am also the primary drummer for the Lake City Church (Mooresville, NC) worship team. Outside of those bands, I am also an independent drummer (or “hired gun” if you will) for live shows, fill-ins, recording sessions, and one time events. I also offer sound services for live shows. Before Covid-19, this was working well and I was on my way to earning a solid living. So much so, that at one point, my music income dwarfed what I made monthly as a Produce Manager by about $600, consistently, and for less hours invested. It was a milestone, and it took a few years to build to that, but still a ways to go to get to my goals.
So, how do you deal with so many bands? Very carefully, and honestly, it is one of the biggest struggles. For one, you have to become your own manager/secretary/liaison, day in and day out, and you cannot become lazy in those roles, ever. The moment you let anything lapse, by accident or otherwise, it becomes a massive train wreck. Then, you have to actively ensure that each band is also constantly aware and up to date not only with their own schedules, but yours as well, and constant reminders about your schedule so they don’t book over you and then say its your fault. This is where tensions from all bands arise, because to each band, they are the most important thing in the world, and to you, they ALL are the most important thing in the world, both individually and collectively at the same time. I sacrifice a lot in this area to keep everyone happy and productive. I can’t tell you how many plans I have broken, the sleep I have lost, or the heated conversations I have had to endure over this. The worst are the last minute changes from venues or organizations, and then the fallout from those changes. And if you can’t work it out, YOU are the enemy and YOU will pay the price. It never matters who’s fault it is, you will pay in the end. And I do. But I love my bands, and I will do all that I can to honor my commitments, at almost any cost. I have always believed that your actions show who you are, and I live by that code.
With all of that said, there are many struggles and issues I have to face. I won’t lie and say that it is easy, or even fun all of the time. It’s the hardest thing I have ever done, and it only gets more challenging as things go on. As Diamonds & Whiskey has grown, even more challenges and obstacles arise. I am working on changing my eating habits and slimming down to fit the confines of today’s industry standards of image and management directives. And the pushes to look this way, play that way, and be anyone but who you are, because only anyone else could be the key to success, not you. Pete Loeffler (Vocalist, guitarist, writer – Chevelle) pretty much laid out what I am feeling these days as D&W makes it’s climb into the national level.
“In the beginning it seems that no one thinks beyond having fun
Which is why you write music in the first place
Always moving, refining, and pushing forward the art that one’s creating
Looking to the right time to share it
And then the headaches of criticism
Senior advisors, unseen people from above
Twisting, distorting that which we love
And never-ending problems with money
Holding you back, preventing progress
I thought you only started ’cause it was fun“
Chevelle – Wonder What’s Next
Fun. I remember it being fun, and it still is. For a while, I was questioning myself, like so many of us do on our journey. I suffer no immunity. Am I really a good enough drummer to play at that level? Do I deserve to be there? Would my band rather have some other drummer? Would they be better served if it were someone else? Does my playing even work for the music? And on and on and on. It’s easy to get lost in that trap. I give the same advise out to friends and acquaintances so often. So here I am, trying to avoid that same advice, and then it hit me recently. These questions have already been answered and the truth of it is undeniable. I was given a gift from birth. It is not of my own design. I recognized it, and worked very hard to cultivate it over the years. Not perfect mind you, not by a long shot, but I was given a gift and charged with using it. I deserve to be here. Not because I would like to or because I said that I should, but the people have spoken. Our fans, our friends, fellow drummers, musicians, engineers, and music lovers. So many kind words, stories, and encouragements from those near and far, known and unknown. At shows, at festivals, heck, even drummers, sound crews, and musicians from national bands at with compliments and kind words (and some laughs). I am where I am meant to be in this moment, and I will continue on the path. At the end of the day, it’s not so much what I think about me and my playing, it’s about all of you! I am humbled, honored, and proud to endure the struggle! It’s worth it, because you are worth it!
– Chris McKinney